Graeme Fryers - who died too young!

It was a sad privilege to give a tribute at the funeral of my young friend Graeme who passed away a few weeks ago. I knew Graeme for about five or six years and knew how he battled with his addiction to drugs. He was a regular at both the Pool Club and the Band of Brothers, a group where we aim to encourage people in the Christian faith, no matter how weak or strong it is. He will be sadly missed by his friends at the group but they will be thankful that they knew him, even though the time they knew him was short.

A Tribute For Graeme, given at his funeral this afternoon.29th August 2018

John Wesley wrote the following words:
'To candid, reasonable men,
I am not afraid to lay open what have been the inmost thoughts of my heart.
I have thought,
I am a creature of a day,
passing through life as an arrow through the air.
I am a spirit come from God,
and returning to God:
just hovering over the great gulf;
till,
a few moments hence,
I am no more seen;
I drop into an unchangeable eternity!
I want to know one thing the way to heaven;
how to land safe on that happy shore. God Himself has condescended to teach the way;
for this very end He came from heaven. He hath written it down in a book.
O give me that book!
At any price, give me the book of God!
I have it:
here is knowledge enough for me.
Let me be "homo unius libri." ( A Man of One Book)

- Of course he was speaking about the Bible.

Today the Band of Brothers and myself remember Graeme our young friend who was almost 31 years old and a member of our group in Holywood.
The Band of Brothers is a group where the Bible is very important and it consists of Christian men (of all levels of spiritual faith) who meet together to support, strengthen and help one another. Our motto is taken from Galatians 6.
‘Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfil the law of Christ.’
In the book of which Wesley speaks of, we read ‘the words of Christ.
‘Love one another as I have loved you’,
we read words of comfort such as
‘Let not your hearts be troubled, believe in God, believe also in me, in my Father’s house are many mansions -And again.
‘Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
And the wonderful words of Christ that were just read -the great invitation
‘“Come to me, all you who are weary and heavy laden , and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn of me, for I am gentle and lowly of heart.’
The iconic image of the Club is taken from the Band of Brothers TV series which was of two soldiers carrying a wounded soldier to safety.

Graeme must have been going to the Band of Brothers and the Pool club for five or six years. Regarding Pool, he was a good player- perhaps because he didn’t have to stretch so much like the rest of us- those big long arms and big legs helped him win many a match.
He also appreciated getting a lift and was always very mannerly. He would also thank me and say’ God bless’ as he did when finishing a phone call. Mostly he was always laughing and enjoying himself.
At the Band of Brothers, we would always have a meal beforehand which I would attempt to make. Now, the only thing I know how to make is scrambled eggs – but I can do it fairly well. I’ve had lots of practice. I’ve been making it every week for about six years! I use lots of milk, lots of butter and lots of good eggs. I’ve seen us all eat about 3 or four eggs each, with Ice Cream or trifle for afters, plus lots of coffee- Graeme always won the prize for the biggest eater, and for finishing first !
At the meal time, Trevor and Tristan would be telling their jokes- of course. They would actually be the same jokes that they told the week before, and even the week before that. But it was always the way they told them that made us laugh!

Before our study, we would sing the great oldies, the great old hymns that few sing any more.
‘What a friend we have in Jesus all our sins and griefs to bear, what a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer’
‘One day at a Time sweet Jesus that’s all I’m asking of you’
10 thousand reasons for my soul to sing
I always remember Graeme emotionally singing the words in the last verse

'And on that day when my strength is failing
The end draws near and my time has come
Still my soul will sing your praise unending
Ten thousand years and then forevermore
Forevermore
Bless the Lord, Oh my soul
Oh my soul, worship his holy name
Sing like never before, Oh my soul
I'll worship your holy name'

We would also sing regularly the hymn that was made famous by the great Elvis and maybe it gives us insight into what troubled him.
'Precious Lord, take my hand
Lead me on, let me stand
I'm tired, I'm weak, I'm lone
Through the storm, through the night
Lead me on to the light
Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home
When my way grows drear, precious Lord linger near
When my light is almost gone
Hear my cry, hear my call
Hold my hand lest I fall
Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home
When the darkness appears and the night draws near
And the day is past and gone
At the river I stand
Guide my feet, hold my hand
Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home
Precious Lord, take my hand
Lead me on, let me stand
I'm tired, I'm weak, I'm lone
Through the storm, through the night
Lead me on to the light
Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home.'

We all got on well together at the Band of Brothers no matter what the age gap was.Trevor Wilson who used to go along before his wife became very unwell, was in his eighties, Colin, and George the watchmaker are both in their 70’s, Neville and Simon in their sixties, Tim Zark, Bill, Chris Ferguson and myself in our fifties- just about, Trevor Maxwell in his 40’s along with Eric who was a soldier and was with us before he moved to England, Graeme and Paul in their 30’s, Tristan in his 20’s. Plus others like Ivan Cousins and Eckey, Clifford Mahood, Davey, Justin Foster, Mark Burnett, Peter Dornan and Paul who would have known Gee at the Pool Club.

At the Band of Brothers, we were essentially brothers in Christ. We aim to share with and encourage one another. A few months ago a member of the group was feeling very suicidal and rang Graeme up at four o'clock in the morning. Graeme spoke with him for hours and brought the young man comfort. For me, Graeme was a hero that day!
As a group, we ate and we drank together, we joked, we laughed, we cried, we argued sometimes, we fell out sometimes, but always made it up again, we prayed and we sang, and we mourned,
we tried to sort out the problems of the world, especially Bill.
But, we blessed one another, we truly loved one another, we prayed for one another and we will all really miss Graeme our brother, the gentle giant. God have mercy on him and God bless him.

At the star,t I read that piece of prose by John Wesley. he wrote:

'I have thought, 

I AM A CREATURE OF A DAY,' 

whether we live to 80 or 60 or 30 or 20 It is such a short time upon this earth.
passing through life as an arrow through the air.

Today, and what better day than today we can decide to give up our lives and surrender to our Maker and our God. I’m sure Graeme would smile too at that thought: and be pleased. Through Christ’s sacrifice for us on the cross, we can know His forgiveness and peace with God. Christ will welcome us.